Saturday, 19 September 2009

The Laws of Attraction

Thursday 21st February in the eleventh month of my sixty eight year is described as itty bitty and where responded to mood and circumstance rather than took control according to plans and objectives, The day began with the discovering of the missing fork, an eating utensil and not a gardening implement.

I have a three lots of forks, 24 hallmarked silver and provided by my aunt when there were eight of us sitting down to Christmas dinner, and which I never now use because they require attention, and where there is no market for such silverware because of the additional work they bring. I have several everyday use forks which are functional and then I bought myself an inexpensive and stylish set of four and deciding to only wash up once a day I sometimes have all in use, some waiting to be washed other dying from washing, so I noticed there were only three and searched the kitchen, the day room and the work room lounge without success. It would turn up sometime and yesterday it did.

I use card, white card because it is cheaper than coloured card and I buy card in bulk because my supplier used to have offers of two reams for one, and I store in three places, firstly in the first floor work room and secondly at the foot of the stairs where 50 reams of 250 cards can be stored in two stacks against the side of one of two units in this part of the hallway, either side of the radiator and which house volumes of development work from the first to set 162. I also keep here the 101 framed photos and the 101 fact cards which are part of project 101 in Black and White the name a printed biographical notebook and which is housed in black and white boxes of nine, three, three and nine, the year of my birth. It is the intention to print a second biographical note books called Sixty Five in Black and White if I am able to complete the project of one card, some twenty thousand volumes and six hundred thousand cards representing each hour of my life to that date. It is not an end, but a means to an end.

I like to keep the stack of unused card in the hallway to a good level as it provides a small surface on which to place items such as incoming or ongoing mail, and to maintain such a level I bring down with me card from the first floor and when the number reams in stock falls to below 100, 25000 cards about six months work at present work rate I begin to look out for another sale. The third location is on a unit in the ground floor work room.

This is on top of two storage bookcase units where there correspondence paper, photo card, pens and paper clips and the like paper, where there is usually a minimum of one opened ream and up to five, 1250 cards and then in a black metal trolley by my work desk there is a ream or two to replenish those in the printer. Yesterday morning as I printed out some work, the printer/computer advised it needed a refill and there was no card on the trolley shelf, or on the unit, so I thought it was time to bring some more downstairs and lo there was the missing fork with a knife on top of a unit under which were stacked reams of card. I tried to remember the circumstance in which I had gone upstairs with a knife and fork in my hand, put them down and forgot.

It would have been evening meal time while food was in the oven and I had collected the utensils to take into the work lounge to eat the meal in front of the telly and then remembered that I was getting short of card and taken them with me without thought and then put them down when deciding to bring down a supply, probably two lots of three and then the timer sounder, or decided to go to the toilet, which is on the half landing, and forgot I had ever had them in my hand. I tend not to use the knives of the new set because while they look good they are not as effective as the range of everyday knives, two lots of steak knives, and two lots of other knives, including two sizes of white bone handled knives which have additional purposes to their main use of putting something on bread slices or rolls, to scratching my back or spreading glue around the edge of thin photo paper to stick to white card for the artman signature card, or remodelling the glitter glue if it squirts out while signing. Thus the mystery of the missing fork was solved yesterday morning.

Because my mind continues to be fertile I tend to focus on what interests rather than on what I should and need to do. A different order of forgetfulness arose this lunchtime after I switched on the Parliamentary channel to listen to the Home Secretary report on the enquiry into how a new Muslim elected Member of Parliament was bugged on the authority of the Chief of Police for his area while visiting a constituent who was in the maximum security prison. This was then followed by an explanation by the present Foreign Secretary why the former Foreign secretary and Prime Minister had repeatedly significantly misled Parliament, the media and the nation in stating categorically that at no time has the USA used British owned lands, waters or airspace for the kidnapping of suspected terrorists to be taken and tortured at Guantanamo Bay, despite allegation that this had taken place. More on these two after I have watched a film and written three communications.

The film can be quickly dismissed. The only aspect of the Laws of Attraction is the title because is concerns two lots of high class and expensive divorce lawyers who in the USA appear to work on their own, and who are unscrupulous rivals in their practice but really fancy and fall in love with each other. It has no redeeming features except designed to appeal to American Irish who retain the worst kind of beliefs about what their ancestral homeland is like. I managed two of the communications after a long phone call and lunch of a king prawn salad with two slices of brown bread, my fare for the next three days having bought three of the £1 special offers before the end of the use expiring date. It was as I return home from the supermarket that Five Live switched over to the statement by the Home Secretary and I eat the salad during the subsequent brief questioning on the live Parliament channel. The Home Secretary had been under fire to produce the report of an inquiry launched after it was disclosed that a new Member of Parliament who may or may not be a Muslim had conversation with an inmate of a security prison recorded without his prior knowledge or consent. The report had been completed in only some two weeks and it was quickly evident that the facts were such that the Government felt confident it could disclose them and bury the particular while dealing with promising to deal with some general issues arising.

The Home Secretary commenced by explaining the difference between those decisions which are for Home Office Ministers on information provided by their staff and those where the Chief Constable and his top assistants can authorise without reference to the government. She then explained that that the inquiry had confirmed that the target of the surveillance had been the inmate and not the Member of Parliament and that when the Order was signed the individual was not a Member of Parliament and therefore not excluded from a covert operation which is said to apply to Members of Parliament, Lawyers and the Clergy. It was said that while senior police officers involved with making the Order had not known that the man was a candidate and then a successful candidate that five junior officers and, obviously when they listen to the tapes they would have discovered that he visited as a Member of Parliament.

I believe it is wise not to comment further other than to relay the way which the BBC in its notes explained the nature of the extent to which we in the UK have become the most watched and listened to in Western Europe. Intrusive surveillance involves the presence of an individual on private premises or in a private vehicle. The BBC note restricted this to residential properties but in my view it should apply to an premises or vehicles which are not open public buildings or vehicles. Such surveillance includes the holding of a device or probe. It therefore involves one or more human beings directly and this may be carried out in legally defined circumstances. Direct surveillance is where the individual is followed around and their movements and overheard conversations are recorded using voice recorders and cameras. Covert surveillance is where those undertaking the surveillance are undercover, disguising the official identity and fitting into the environment of the person or persons under surveillance and Intercept surveillance with involves any communications such as phone, faxes, internet, letters, packages and parcels. These methods are recognised to be the function of the police, customs and the security services and where the direct involvement of Politicians should be severely restricted to defining policies and practices because of the risk of use for party political and personal purposes. Clearly Lawyers, Clergymen and Members of Parliament should not be excluded from such surveillance if there are grounds for believing that they have committed or are about to break the law.

It was fortuitous that immediately following this statement and before the House considered the renewal and amendment to legislation of security measures in the face of International Terrorism, that the Foreign Secretary, and Member of South Shields came hot foot to disclosed that inadvertently, his predecessor who say alongside him, and the former Prime Minister had repeatedly lied to Parliament, the Media and Public over what is officially described as extraordinary rendition by the United States over or within British Territory. Extraordinary Rendition is the fancy name thought up to misrepresent the kidnapping of individuals by the US government, its security services and military of terrorist suspects without legal process in order to take hem to Guantanamo Bay or elsewhere where they can be tortured into confession and for information because torturing is no permitted within the United States. The British View across of the Labour, Conservative and Liberal Democrat Parties is to up hold our standard that torturing under any circumstance and anywhere is wrong, and that we maintained this standard through the Second World War even when we came close losing. If torturing does take place, and it has taken place it is not authorised and therefore illegal and those involved will be appropriate published, The potential crime which the Foreign Secretary came to Parliament to admit to was not that in fact there had been two cases of extraordinary rendition using an American base on British soil in the Pacific but that the Prime Minister and the Foreign Secretary had unintentionally lied. If evidence is ever provided that a Government Minister intentionally lies to Parliament that is the end of their political career and public status with the most celebrated case during my lifetime that of John Profumo. The case against Tony Blair in relation to the Iraq dossier and statement to the Parliament has not been proven. Thus the Foreign Secretary had no alternative but to admit the new situation to Parliament and to relay the profuse apologies of the USA government who are reported to have said that this was an administrative failure which had only recently come to light.

The Foreign Secretary, no doubt with Prime Minister's approval had the sense not to leave the situation as it is but to insist on providing the US with a detailed list of all flights about which there has been substantial evidence that kidnapped individuals were being transported over and onto British Territory and to seek assurance that there has been no other administrative oversights. It will be evident that the US administration will have a record of every individual who has been transported for holding and torturing at Guantanamo or elsewhere and that there will be a record of their movements unless these were deliberate not kept or have been destroyed. I sense that with departure of Tony Blair and President Bush, and with the possibility that someone other than a an establishment approved candidate is elected President that there is anxiety that the true facts will emerge. By establishment approval I refer to Mrs Clinton who will no doubt have the support of state agencies, the military, the secretary organisations, capitalist big business and the criminal organisations as not someone who will rock the boat too much especially after their first 100 days, whereas the Republican candidate has expressed some worrying radical opinions and Mrs Clinton’s main rival for power is an unknown in the mould of Tony Blair. He could go the way of Tony Blair or become another American martyr should he threaten to put his words into practice, such is the nature of contemporary government and Society in the New World Order. The other thought is that the special relationship has been further exposed for its reality. At present the American dollar still rules but does anyone know the name of Chinese bank notes? Yuan. Jiao or Mao's and Fens!

Julie and Julia

Friday 18th September commenced with contrasting fortunes. I begin with a good tale of exceptional customer service by Amazon the on line supplier of new, cut price and second-hand goods. I have used Amazon over recent years to purchase for myself and for others. Earlier in the year I received the gift of a set of DVD of the science fiction series 4400 and which I put aside until ready to watch all episodes in quick succession. It was several months before the right moment arrived and I found the series concept of interest and intended to commence the second disk after watching the double first year introduction and the second programme. I was disappointed to then find that the first disk had been duplicated and the second missing. I contacted the individual who had provided the gift hoping it had been purchased from a chain with a local branch and was advised that it had been obtained from Amazon. I suspected this would cause a problem obtaining a replacement and made the initial contact with the firm, put through to call centre probably located in India and was advised that the original purchaser had to notify the problem and the firm would send direct to me a replacement set. Almost immediately the firm had been notified by the purchaser I was forwarded two emails, the first advising that the replacement had been sent and its progress could be tracked and the second advising that the original had to be returned within 30 days and giving the online reference to download a label for the return as well as an enclosure to be included in the. Despite the postal strikes and delays the replacement set arrived within two days of the email notifications and I was able to repack the faulty set in the original packing and downloading the labels which had code bars identifying the specific problems and purchaser. If that is not brilliant customer service I do not know what is.

I enjoyed New Tricks last night which continued without the presence of the former likely lad and a new face, but did not enjoy England being thrashed as the batsmen once again failed and the team are at risk of being whitewashed 7.0, the first this has happened in an international series. In the afternoon I also enjoyed a clever mystery drama with Yul Brynner being not just Yul Brynner and two Yul Brynner’s and with Britt Eckland, she who was the one time girl friend of Peter Selllers and had the wicked siren part in the original The Wicker Man. Within the past month there was an excellent programme in the coast series which feature the area of Dumfries and Galloway which was used to represent the fictitious Hebredian Island - Summer Isle featured in the film. Such has been the popularity of the film with its cult following that the village in which the film was made has become tourist attraction to such an extent that souvenirs have created a income and a re-enactment of the film ending is undertaken once a year.

When I misunderstood the position in the cricket championship I was tempted to book accommodation for the game at the Rosebowl, Hampshire this week but was put off by the prices of accommodation. This has proved just as well not just because the championship was settled in brilliant sunshine last week but the weather has changed from high summer to winter within the space of a few days and the forecast is not great for next week’s trip to Worcester. Last night the temperature dropped to the lower 40’s some 10 degrees lower than on the South coast. Today it is warmer in the 50’s with an 110 difference with the temperature at Worcester. The ten day forecast suggests that there should three full days cricket with showery rain on the second day and the day time temperatures touching 60 degrees so is it wrap up coat watching cricket with plenty of hot coffee and soup on hand. The present game at the Rosebowl looked promising on the second day after Durham reached a total of more than 400 in their first innings and Hampshire had lost four wickets for under 100 with young Borthwick getting two of these. However with various stands the total added up to within 50 runs of Durham and a draw became inevitable. Hampshire by not losing have almost made themselves secure from relegation. Sussex remain favourites to be relegated by a narrow margin if the two key games next week are drawn although there is a good chance they could lose at Nottinghamshire who will be fighting to get back second place from Somerset and with Warwickshire also in the hunt of the position. Hampshire are now the least likely to be relegated play Yorkshire at Headingley so a draw appears in the interests of both clubs although Yorkshire will want to end the season on a strong note. The major excitement in the second division where Northants looked to have a commanding lead with two games to go. Having been bowled out today Essex who are one of the other chasing clubs have been set 240 odd runs to win from 50 overs and at 84 without loss the 150 required from 30 overs is attainable. If they win Essex will be ahead with one game to play but with four other clubs in which a chance of promotion. I found out Essex did win after going tot he pictures and they now are second in the table with points in had so if they win next week they will gain promotion.

There has been a flurry of fast food offers over the past couple of weeks. Following on from the breakfast vouchers Kentucky Fried Chicken sent householders sent households main meal concessions and today I enjoyed a Cimbatta sandwich with chips and a coffee of £1. I could also get two Chicken Twisters for he price of one. My Local Wetherspoon’s pub which is a short walk part way down the Hill and close to the Metro station has circulated a range of food and drink offers which includes a traditional breakfast and coffee for £1.99. In force tot he end of November I envisage making use of the four over the period. There are also two vouchers for 20% off the price of a main meal such as fish and chips. Unfortunately I need a friend to enjoy one of two steak meals with a bottle of wine for £15. McDonalds circulated today five vouchers for their main meals for £1.99 plus the cost of coffee. There is also a voucher for a McChicken or Big Mac with a medium soft drink for the same price. Alas I cannot make use of £5 off the price of an 8 or 12 piece Griddle Chicken variety bucket and where the for the 8 size you get 4 fillets, 4 mini fillets one large pop corn chicken four regular fries and two large sides such as beans and coleslaw and which I make 15 items and
The 12 piece has 19 items WoW.

I also went to see a film about food called Julie and Julia based on two true stories. First the true stories. Julia Childs became an American Cordon Bleu cooking guru after discovering French cooking after her husband had been posted to Paris in the US Diplomatic Corps. She then trained as a cook and with collaborators wrote her magnum opus the 734 Mastering the Art of French Cooking and then on returning to the states became a national cooking icon through television series, videos and DVD’s and books. Her French Chef series last 10 years from 1963 and the final series 1999 2000 had 22 episodes. She was 87 at the time. Her books went on to cover the whole range of food cooking and after her death an autobiography was completed by a relative. One hand it could be said that she was not an original creative genius and this is how she is played by Meryl Streep in the film. Childs had a conventional middle class family stand Republican background with a maid cook and a father who thought Joseph McCarthy was the bees knees. After graduation in English she moved to New York as a copy writer returning to her family in California until 1941. After the bombing of Pearl Harbour she attempted to enlist but was rejected because of her height but was recruited by the OSS working first in the USA in the Secret Intelligence unit and then in 1944 to Ceylon and to China where according to the film she met her husband who its was said worked for the intelligence. He husband in contrast was an artist and a poet who had lived in Paris and immediately after the way (the couple were married in the USA in 1946 when Julia was 34 and again according to the film a virgin and the significance f which will be revealed shortly. The husband was then posted to Paris with the USA Information Service, (which usually implies covert intelligence) although again according to the film he was summoned to Washington to be questioned about his loyalty and personal life, Are you a homosexual he was asked ? The film attempts to draw the connection between a love of food and sex and also suggests that her devotion to the art, something which is still largely a male preserve to this day was the consequence of not having children.

This is when the story of Julie Powell comes in, a young post graduate approaching 30 married with an unpublished novel and no children who loves cooking great food and has Judith Childs as her idol and her Mastering French Cooking tome as her Bible. She works for the government and has to deal with frustrated, angry and depressed victims of 9/11 and their families. She hits on the idea of recreating all the 500 odd Julia Childs French Cooking recipes during one year and fortunately the combined salaries of the couple, he works as an editor for Archaeology Magazine means they can afford the ingredients of the food which appeared to be shared regularly with friends. In real life she was born in 1973 and graduating in creative writing and theatre, and with her husband lived in a noisy flat above a Pizza restaurant in the Queen’s District of New York. She not only decides to recreate the cook book for her husband and friends but write a daily Blog which gains some popularity according to the film and which in turns leads to an interview reported in the New York Times. This leads to attention in the cooking and food world and to the publication of her Blog. According to the film there was also a close association between the love of good food and sex. It is here that the parallels between the two women end because Julia remained conventionally, and it is understood, happily married, until the death of her husband a decade before her, he was ten years older when they married. Julie on the other hand had at least one major row with her husband who left her for a period and according to the film returned to live happy ever after. However Julie has written a second book with the publication delayed until the end of the year because it is about the affair she had after the publication of the first book. The new work is entitled Cleaving the story of Marriage, Meat and Obsession. This is not mentioned in the film all the reason for the break in the film is her obsession with completing all the recipes within one year and writing about them. In the film Julie is told that the aged Julia reacts hostilely at the news of what Julie has done because it shows disrespect and they never get to meet, Julie consoling herself that Julia has probably never reads her Blog which she regards as a tribute and a work of love. In real life the actress playing Julie, Amy Adams, had worked with Meryl as the young nun in Doubt who reports her concerns to the mother Superior.

I thought the film was overlong and without a dramatic conclusion. I then read a brilliant review of the film by Benjamin Sutton and Henry Sutton in L Magazine (USA) who make the point that at one level the film has been written on the basis that making cooking into an creative art form a substitute for children although good is a momentary experience hence the need to continue doing it, just as good sex is OK but loses its potency if it does not result in children. I suspect the film ended as it did because the writer and producers were aware that one aspect of the story quickly fell apart or perhaps that a sequel was already under consideration!

Now to the two things which spoilt my day. Neither are world shattering in the great scheme of things but the two upset me greatly coming together. I had been looking forward to the new season of relayed Opera from the Metropolitan New York and although the Cineworld chain was listed on the Internet site, except at Bolden there was no announcement by Cineworld so I contacted and was told the contract was under negotiation. I suspect the problem was to do with price because the relays are being shown in Newcastle at the Tyneside film theatre but with prices trebling or doubling according to the performance £25 without concessions and £21.50 with. Last night at Bolden I checked and the negotiations failed and looking back int he web site the Cineworld theatres have been removed and outside of London where there are half a dozen there are vast swathes of the country, especially in the Midlands where there is no showing. I also scrapped paint off the wing of the car and the less said about that the better for my mental health. There is also a good weekend of sport ahead having discovered that Sunderland’s game at Burnley is on the TV at lunchtime Saturday and the last one Day at the Riverside on Sunday. There is also the vital Davis Cup where we have no talent apart from Murray who is injured and therefore may not be available for the doubles and second single. Britain faces relegation again this time from the second level to third. Come Dancing also goes head to head with the X Factor together with the return of the series Merlin. It is also the Great North Run on Sunday where some 50000 runners are said to have registered for the half marathon.

Wednesday, 16 September 2009

X Men the Last stand and TV

A whole week has passed since that wonderful first day at the cricket and my mood, created to a great extent by the weather and because of age is that the party is well and truly over. Fortunately I have the internal resources to overcome these feelings although it is always sensible to balance moments of euphoria with the reality of the commonplace.

My work, looking back, not just on the previous day though these writings, but on my seventy years in the context of my immediate environment, country, planet and universe is also a constant reminder of the reality of individual human experience. I need to devote more time to the work as well as to settling what is to happen to it when my physical presence as well as self awareness is no longer. I was reminded of this impending last night just before midnight, not a good time for such experience by the last episode pf Morse, the televised version of the Dexter novel set mainly in the City of Oxford and surrounding countryside with occasional forays to London and at least once to Italy. I had forgotten the story of the episode which remains unimportant because of the brilliant portrayal by John Thaw of what it is like to be told that nothing could be done to remedy his heart condition other than limit feeling degrees of grottiness by giving up two of the things he needed most in his life, his work and real ale and scotch. He could not give up either, trying to become enthusiastic about bird watching from a window overlooking his garden. What added to the performance is that John Thaw died soon after this programme. Performance like this, couple with my own feelings about the inevitability of an ending at some point couple with direct experience of the different ways of that time and that moment only serves to underline the pain I continue to feel about the waste of life, especially young life through military service and childhood death because of famine and preventable illness. I awoke this morning to hear someone involved in the provision of help in natural disasters that climate change was already having a negative impact on the health of the poorest nations as well as reminding that during the last major heat wave 3000 people had died in the UK more than the those from the swine flu virus to-date and where the availability of vaccination should match the expected growth of the virus as winter approaches.

I also watched the Fixer on ITV at 9pm in preference to the last hour of the fifth one international between Australia and England at Trent Bridge. I had paid some attention to the England innings in which the batsmen made good starts, including Captain Strauss, who suffered an unfortunate dismissal and where no one really took off big time in a prolonged way although the team managed to reach 299, but still short of what was needed to set Australia a difficult challenge. The problem is that England cannot take wickets without Pietersen and having discarded Harmison and Patterson and with Rashid and the other slow bowlers unable to hold back the tide of Australian run getting. I had also completely forgotten the first round of the main Euro football competition but switched over to find that Manchester United and Chelsea were winning 1.0 as the final whistle was sounded in their respective matches

The Fixer was the third in the series experienced with the fist concerning the criminal exploitation of children across counties for sex, violence adoption and the use by one arm of extended government of others to achieve individual and collective objectives. This week following the expected death from national causes of champion of the licence to kill team, the day to day administrative head does a deal with the creative par excellence from overseas black ops to get rid of the alleged previously unknown head of drug organisation producing heroin in Afghanistan. We the audience immediately knew as the team administrator that they were being used and the man was obviously lying about the situation and had his own as well as government agency agenda. The top killer in the team is shot barely escaping with his life and becomes depressed at his failure and the apparent pointlessness of it all. There is always someone else to step in a take over whatever racket or criminal activity is being tackled and the motives are always.. The target in question is a disillusioned SAS operative who has been sent by the black ops individualist to make money from drugs in order to finance what he regards as important operations starved of funds because of government funds. The idea that the government uses such people, as it does without the closest of monitoring and with the capacity to eliminate their activities if they get out of hand is preposterous but serves to remind that governments do use the creative individualists and that they do sometimes get out of hand and their activities can become counter productive as well as the making of genuine mistakes. In the episode the gone stray front line operative is taken out and the black ops organiser lives to another day as does the team. The series is of the third rank lacking great scripts and great acting.

This cannot be said for Waking the Dead with Trevor Eve as the wayward individualist head of team and Sue Johnston who first came to attention in Brookside while Trevor who is a first rank stage actor made his TV name with the series Shoestring. Boyd is also one of those prepared to break the law to bring the guilty to justice. The story of the two night episode was profound and accurately explained.

An already emotional vulnerable young woman goes out one evening to make a phone call using a public box (in the days before the mobile phone significantly reduced the need to go out of the home to make clandestine calls and is forced to take her young brother with her to the local store. On the way home the car has a puncture and two men who in car who stop to help turn out to be rapists and one kills the boy and attempts to kill the young woman who survives physically but becomes an emotional wreck, especially when the police fail to catch the two men involved. Boyd and the unit become involved again when the girl attempts to commit suicide and leaves a note for Boyd saying find them.

The young woman is persuaded to come to the unit and describe what happened to her and her brother so they the sceptical other members will be motivated. Through the latest scientific methods, some luck and by Boyd breaking into a private home to obtain evidence the team are able to identify the two men and then obtain the evidence sufficient for a prosecution. The key was to work out from the account of the victim that there are two very different men. One is inadequate who convinces himself that he is fulfilling the needs of his victims as well as of himself and is attempting to find the love and satisfaction he cannot obtain in the rest of his life. They work out that he was a serial rapist in the area of Manchester where he lived and may be continuing from his job as a caretaker at a college crammer when he looks after his disabled wife in wheelchair. When the unit close in on him he contacts the other younger man and blackmails him into looking after his wife explaining that he has kept incriminating evidence just for this kind of situation.

The second man is described by the Sue Johnston character as someone with anger towards women seeking revenge for what happened to him in his past, (in this instance a mother and a childhood girlfriend who he subsequently married but found out that she had become promiscuous while attending university before him). This was the man who killed he boy, beat up the victim as he raped her and pushed the other man into throwing her off a bridge as he had thrown off the boy. The question asked by Trevor and others members of the team is why did these two men unite in what appeared to be the only joint rape and murder. Sue explains the psychology and Boyd and other team members find out the particular circumstances which led to the two men having contact and striking a relationship. The second man has become an outstanding a surgeon consultant and I thought for a moment the moral issue was whether there was a case for letting him go because of the good he had done and was doing in reparation. The great twist of this story was that that the victim, became perpetrator. Boyd when be broke into the house was spotted by someone who noted the number of his car and he was traced and the anti corruption/ misuse of position squad are brought in and tell Boyd to suspend his involvement in work pending further investigation. This happens at the very point he is about to tell the victim that the case has been solved but now as a result of his methods there is the likelihood that a prosecution will flounder because a criminal act was used to obtain evidence.

Aware that this is so the victim nearly kills a member of the unit and then appears to kill the man who murdered her brother. Boyd has to prevent the woman then killing herself. The story therefore brought out the appalling truth that victims do become perpetrators of crime in some instances, especially if the crime is not detected and perpetrators brought to justice. It also underlines the point that the end can never be used to justify the means.

However just how difficult it can be for those working in justice system to defeat the professional criminal was under lined in the latest episode of New Tricks which similar to Waking the dead is a unit set up to examine previously unsolved crimes, including crimes which only come to light several years, sometimes decades after they were committed. In the latest episode the action takes place during the trial of a man who has confessed to having run down the wife of one of the team members. The Barrister defending the man has obtained information about the each of the unit members, and reveals that one in addition to having had a questionable private life with four marriages and various children used his position to check DNA information whether a young woman who had contacted was his daughter. She is not but in order not to disappoint he has lied to her but when faced with telling the truth in the court he hesitates sufficiently before doing so and she realises this. Another member of the team is shown to have a chemical imbalance which means that he needs to take medication throughout the day to remain in balance and that if he takes alcoholic to which he had become addicted or leaves off the medication he becomes exceptionally emotionally unstable and attacked in the witness box he is broken down. Similarly the victim’s partner is exposed as being obsessed and unable to move on, talking to his wife every night over her ashes buried in the garden and surrounded by lighted candles. The succession of attacks on the characters and behaviour of the key witnesses for the prosecution is successful before a jury as the man is acquitted.

A very different fictional experience was X Men the Last Stand and which take away the computerised trickery this is story about racialism and how those with the best intentions can become criminals and enemies of society, endangering the future of humanity. The theme of the series of films )in which the The Last Stand could be the last as three of the leading characters are believed to have been killed but where in two instances the bodies are not shown and the death is imprecise), is the need for coexistence between “normal” humans and mutations some of whom have superhuman powers which include significant changes to the physical body. The films are based on the Marvel comic book characters and a new novelisation was created and is said to differ in some respects from the film story.

The issue raised by the film is a moral one. What if is it possible through medical science to create a means by injection abnormal people can become normal so they do not stand out and can lead anonymous lives. In the film the antidote is offered free but it is also developed into a weapons to destroy the powers of the mutants when they decide that this voluntary approach is wrong and want society to treat and accept mutants as having the same rights as everyone else. It touches upon the age old argument about the military and social uses of science and the degree to which human beings tend to want to be normal or average and can become hostile to the different and extraordinary.

In the film series Patrick Stewart plays the head of a special school, rather like the Harry Potter Hogwarts is designed to harness the powers of Mutant for good and help in bridging the differences between those with special powers and those which do not. Although wheel chair bound he plays someone with exceptional ability to read minds and influence. He has been able to keep in check the negative powers within one of his former students who dies at the end of the previous film and is resurrected but only through her dark powers whose telepathy is stronger than that of Patrick Stewart and telekinetic powers with atomic destructiveness. Fortunately there are traces of her human self left which means that she accepts death from someone who loves her at the end of the film thus saving her comrades and the world twice.

Hugh Jackman plays the man who loves her, a Wolverine whose bones have been encased in metal and has metal claws which emerge from each hand as powerful fighting and defensive weapons. He misguidedly releases “Phoenix” from her controlled state after she is brought to the centre and therefore it is fitting that he is responsible for neutralising her at the end of the film. Patrick was already grooming Cyclops to take over from him as head of the school, a man who has a destructive energy blast through his eyes which unless being used for good purposes have to be shielded by a ruby quartz visor. He is devastated by the loss of Phoenix and is believed killed by her during the film. His prospective position as school head is passed to Halle Berry who plays Storm with the power to control the weather with her mind. She refused to participate in the film unless she was given a part which reflected the role of the character in the comic books. Other characters include a blue haired all over scientist with a high IQ and great strength and agility who is US government Minister in charge of Mutant Affairs, Anna Paquin is Rogue who has power to absorb the life force, killing anyone them if she holds on them too long. Another has a body with the characteristics of Ice and can use the power to combat fire by creating force of ice and cold (Iceman). Another student can walk through matter. Colossus can transform his skin into steel with power to resist force including heat.

Unfortunately there are also Mutant forces who want to redress the balance between humans and mutants. They want to destroy the ability to convert mutants into functioning humans. They are led by Sir Ian McKellen as Magneto a Holocaust victim with the power to manipulate any form of metal and in the spectacular finale he moves the Gold Gate Bridge so they can get to Alcatraz which is being used as a medical science laboratory producing the mutant antidote. He then uses cars which have stopped on the bridge as weapons tossing them into the air as weapons which are then ignited into fire bombs by one of his supporters (Pyro) a former Institute Student with an inbuilt flame throw which he uses against his former friend Iceman in a dual to the death.

Sir Ian’s main assistant is Mystique who can shape shift into female and male forms including other characters in the film and who has great strength and agility. She takes a hit from the human converting drugs to protect Sir Ian so becomes human. When he discards her because of this she provides intelligence to the government. Vinnie Jones plays Juggernaut who is a new recruit with the power which increases as he gains momentum, able to penetrate all substances and cannot be stopped. There is also a character Multiple who can create unlimited copies of himself. Finally among the mutants is the son of the man who has developed the vaccine. He has angel wings and can fly. He hates being odd and his father creates the vaccine to help his son however at the last moment the son changes his mind and at the end of the film we see him using his wings to fly freely. Given that the characters have this range of powers it is inevitable that much of the film taken with showing off displays and combats. However the central theme is always present and for once an American President is portrayed as a thoughtful, intelligent, caring individual, faced with hard choices which are often the lesser of several evils.

Antwone Fisher , and the Brit Awards

A wise individual said to me that preparation is the essential ingredient of any activity whether cooking food, repapering a wall, or writing an autobiography. I was reminded of this in two ways during the course of today as I collated together key papers about my life and contemporary documents and records and commenced to make notes. I decided to begin with my first birth certificate, This is a shorted version obtained for me when I was eighteen years of age in 1957 which does not disclose the name of parents. It provoked a memory that for some years I believed that as an illegitimate child I could not have a passport. I suspect I know the reason why I thought this because to have a passport one needed to have a birth certificate and the birth certificate would have led to information or questions about my father and the continuing difficulties this created for everyone, especially for me.

The process of collating information and writing is therefore slow and sometimes painful. There was a further delay when I decided to view a film on DVD which I knew nothing of the story except that it was about a sailor with an anger problem sent to see a psychiatrist. I nearly watched the other film included in this week's delivery.

The film has the title Antwone Fisher which is the real name of a remarkable man who was able to overcome the damaging effects of a deprived and abusing childhood, a troubled teenager and a tendency to lose his temper violently when provoked during the early days of what became an 11 year naval service. Until having the good fortune to be assigned to a psychiatrist who was prepared to work outside the box and persuaded him to go in search of his roots with the consequence that he achieved reconciliation with his past, and which in turn let him to become a writer and to establish and sustain adult relationships. He has become the role model for many who feel they have no opportunity to express themselves and make something of their lives.

I liked the film which sensitively and intelligently covers some traditionally taboo issues, such as the sexual abuse of children by females can have just as damaging effects as those by men, and similarly that women can also be as physically, verbally and emotionally abusive as men. The film has had its critics describing with some arguing that is a "conventional tear jerker," saccharine coated, and a by the numbers patient doctor pic, but such comments fail to appreciate the difficulties and dangers of dealing with the complexity of the impact of brutalised and abnormal upbringings particularly when the damage is not created by the natural parents, (in this instance he was born in prison and removed from his mother after two months into state care and his unmarried and unregistered father was murdered), but by those appointed on behalf of society to care for him. This is a film designed to entertain and move, the directorial debut by Denzel Washington, not an academic or psychological paper. While the film has a good feel happy ending, it also pulls no punches about the difficulties of overcoming one's individual heritage, and just how difficult it is talk about how one felt and continues to feel, and the hopes and fears which continue to last a lifetime, and the luck of finding the right person or persons at the right time, who possess the love and the understanding to see beyond how the child, the young person and the adult presents themselves.

Sometimes the portrayal of the bare facts, the naked truth can be counter productive. Recently the media has been giving attention to the number of suicides among teenagers, the majority of school age, in and around the area of Bridgend in Wales, over twenty, and the speculation that they are part of some cult internet inspired pact. There is an investigation although the first official statement is that there has been no connections or links established and by now, it six weeks or so, the computers of the earlier tragedies should have been checked long since. The parents of some of those who recently died have rightly criticised the media for adding to the problem. It is unfortunate that many parents and the society in general do not understand how unhappy and desperate teenagers can become in what are in fact normal, average loving homes, and the publicity that some have taken the dreadful step of ending their lives can incite others in similar predicaments to do likewise.
The aspect of Antwone Fisher which affected me most was the difficulty, even when you know the solution, of directly setting out to find the information or the people who might provide the remedy. Antwone was fortunate in finding some relatives who were pleased to see him whereas his mother had lacked the good fortune that subsequently came his way and according to the film, was ending her days in a grim environment and unable to communicate with her first born. He needed to make the visit and ask the questions, but in terms of his life his future needed to walk away and find himself fully, As I have written before, and will continue to write the drive to know who are our biological parents is within our physical, emotional, spiritual and psychological make up for those transported across continents and generations the Roots may appear distant, dying or dead, but the need to know is always there and yet the older we are before searching the more difficult the journey becomes. This is why I feel so strongly that the truth of every conception should be recorded, and why I am in fully in favour of an identity record which include disclosed information but more importantly the DNA records. The earlier children are helped to cope with the truth of their origins the less likely they are to react when the truth is discovered later and the less likely the child will grow up to commit the sins of their parents. The need to create a fairy tale childhood is understandable as is our desire to explore the universe and uncover the mysteries of matter and of life, so why do we all run away from the realities of individual behaviour and human interaction?

I went to bed and then awoke from sport at its most sublime to the futility of playing against a community when one is tired or concentration divided between competing priorities. I stayed up to watch the commencement of the New Zealand one day 50 over innings chasing a total of 341 to win, with the knowledge that the wicket and setting were as perfect as it is ever perfect to be, but retired when it was evident that the home side were not in the mood to surrender, and possessed the knowledge that they had succeeded in achieving a higher score batting second against the might of Australia in a recent series. I went to bed around 3 am content but not expecting a New Zealand collapse. I got up once during the night I think and I remember being in bed with lots of dreams, some interesting at the time and worthy of remembering, but alas the next thing was to awake with the sound of the telephone and forgetting that it could be late in the morning, I answered from sudden anxiety that a call so early could be important. It was a well spoken gentleman who did not immediately announce my name or saying who he was and having had interesting calls of this nature once or twice in the past, I prepared myself for something important. It was not, but a canny telesales person for a national newspaper who wanted to know the frequency of my readership as a precursor to make me a special offer. After making a cup of tea I switched on the telly to find another match in another country being shown and resorted to the Teletext on Terrestrial BBC to find that with the last ball New Zealand had required 2 runs to win but had only scored 1, England therefore had narrowly missed a victory which could have led to a series match winning final match, or could have lost the series. The result was therefore an honourable draw which means that if England can win the last game the series will end with an honourable draw, If only life could be like that and computers. Later I found that New Zealand should have won long before the final ball of the game and that captain Collingwood had backed a hunch and given the last over to an unused team member who achieved what looked impossible.

I have achieved 101 winning games against the computer at the lowest level of play three times but managed to lose the record of each instance and therefore set about the task again. At first I floundered, then reached 50 games and then 98 and then reverted to a sequence of poor performances. Last night my attention switched between the cricket and playing games with the consequence of several small runs before failure to work out situations led to drawn games. This morning I suffered the humiliation of not just a drawn game but a checkmate. Admitting the fact, like my excess weight would once lead to remedial determination. The will is lacking for the moment.

The evening was given over to the Brit Awards and the Amy Winehouse problem. It was all very odd as a man who has lived all his life in American and who last year came along to support Amy Winehouse who was the star of the show and carried off several awards is himself nominated this year with one public voting category, the song Valerie performed by Amy and which would be nothing without her is the nominee, and the public well asked to vote for him with the artist Amy Winehouse, presumably from fear she would not be well enough, or has there been censorship. Last year Russell Brand did the presenting which only confirmed the wisdom of doing something else and this year it isi the Osbourne family who were sound muted twice when on the red carpet. What was I saying about censorship and the language of pop culture! The red carpet beforehand was excruciatingly awful where one female presenter using the opportunity to upstage the stars at every opportunity, although some of them were drunk inarticulate yobs. It was also evident that the entire two hour primetime show had been carefully organised to avoid the kind of embarrassing moments which delight the show business media and the popular dailies. One problem of the night was that most of the presenters were more famous and talented than the performers, although one aspect, I underestimated because it became evident that the elevation of a musician, producers but non singer was a front to help Amy so she was brought on to sing two songs, Leona only her single and Sir Paul McCartney was given the big treatment and several numbers to close the show. The problem with the Brits is that it is a giant party for the British Industry as it is with 4000 diners, lots and lots of alcohol at which the fans are also given at place at the table. It is not intended for the likes of me. It is also reflects aspects of contemporary British Society which results in the worst and dangerous excesses. But there is no involvement in the manufacture and use of weapons of mass destruction or pretending to be concerned about the extent of poverty and ill health among hundreds of millions of other human beings, or in the persecution of political opponents or those who question and challenge the actions of individual governments and as far I know while vast amounts of money is made and used to buy overpriced fashionable goods and services, and may be gambled away, it is their money and not the money of other putting hundreds of jobs at risk as what the performance of the executives of the Northern Rock or the Credit Suisse marking down its value by 1 million dollars, or the young man with or without accomplices who squandered millions more than Nick Leason trying to regain a losing position and where in all instances they were gambling with the money of shareholders and depositors and the livelihoods of the other workers.

After the Brits I spotted a one hour documentary about the Osbourne Family, in particular on Sharon and recent bad publicity which I was not aware of. At one point Ben Mills reminded of how likeable he is, his abilities as a singer, composer and instrumentalist and how he had become Sharon's protégé, how she was often two faced appearing charming to someone then bad mouthing them the next and how she had dropped him after he did not win the contest. However I thought the observation of one of the other the other contributors was spot on the money, when they said, the problem was that Sharon saw that Ben did not have the X factor. Only time will tell.

I end on a note about living in the land of variable and frequently inexplicable pricing. I decided to obtain another copy of my full birth certificate for reasons which may be significant or not when it arrives. It is sometime since ordering certificates when investigating the family history prior to the 100th birthday of my mother and given the pace of change I assumed that Gov certificates was the only site providing copies on line. However I stopped in disbelief at the inflationary increase in less than two years when asked to pay £23. I then embarked a on search to find the service where I had been registered and where copies cost only £9, a discount from that if you applied to the local registrar for a copy. This took sometime during which I found that the National Family History centre which had been based at Islington was closing and being transferred to a new building at the National Archives centre at Kew. This was of double interest as earlier in the day I had noted that my admission readers ticket had expired, which in turn reminded of the day when I first examined the army papers of my maternal grandfather and then the entry in a giant register of those awarded a Royal Hospital Chelsea Out pension, and where the register had been conveyed as part of a daily lorry from the secure depository in a former salt mine some 250 miles or more away where the majority of national documents are stored. I found the site and then could not log on as the code was out of date or not properly recorded. It then took two attempts of obtaining a temporary code to log on and make the order. The price was £10 a difference of £13.

The Blue Butterfly and MySpace review

To continue the celebration of a year with myspace I am spending the day with my friends updating mylist, reviewing the top listed, rediscovery and remembering. I set to work around 10am and fished the task and first writings of notes between 4 and 5 pm and only then considered what was on television for the rest of the day and noticed that a film was being shown where its trailer provoked interest. The Blue Butterfly is a 2004 Canadian film based on a true event where in 1987 a boy with an incurable tumour was taken into the rain forest to fulfil a dream of seeing and capturing a blue butterfly and where the true life event is reported to have hand a miraculous outcome. The film uses this event to create a drama against magnificent wild life photography and to explore the feelings and issues which a ten year old faces in that situation, his widowed mother and the specialist hired to help the boy achieve his ambition. The subject of a dying young child will be upsetting to children, or those who have experienced the untimely death of a loved one, although the way he film ends, plus the written note as to what happened to the boy creates a feel good and inspiring mood and merited being shown on the big screen rather than on a Satellite TV channel.

My MySpace adventure began by accident a year ago as I went to see Leone Lewis as part of the X Factor Tour and on looking up the backgrounds and competition information on the official site I found that Ben Mills mentioned myspace and this led to exploring myspace and immediately recognising it met a number of personal needs and fitted into my working project now renamed 100.75. Over five years before I investigated the possibility of creating my own site but concluded I had to go to the expense of having one designed for me to meet planned requirements before I had fully worked out the project and got underway. I was in danger of putting the cart before the horse. Then as my project got underway and circumstances changed I lost the confidence in put my central contention into practice that to be considered a contemporary artist the way one worked had to be open to public scrutiny on the basis that I lived at a time when everything we do and say can be viewed by anyone, anywhere, anytime with the technology. While the structure of Myspace does not enable the kind of comprehensive work site desirable it has provided several unexpected opportunities and experiences.

The traditional approach to offering oneself is through what creative work one is good at, writing, painting, music, dance and to write an autobiography if one is successful in ones life time or have a biography written towards the ends of days or after them. This has always seemed unsatisfactory to me because I am interested in the minutiae of lives, for example not just the kind of books, films music someone has been interested in, but what books what music, what films and which over a life will amount to hundreds and thousands of pages of lists, depending on the kinds of records kept, or the extent of personal collections. Then there are the pictures and films. The there are the clothes, the possessions, and the memories of food and meals, places lived and places visited as well as what they did and what they accomplished, what they thought and their interests in addition to the creative work in question. My interests have been much wider than creative people, travellers, sporting personalities, politicians, inventors and discoverers, but always the same approach. Myspace provides the framework for this through the profile, the pictures especially now that the number uploaded has developed included multiple loadings, the inclusion of sound and vision and the writing, as well as feedback and communication on matters of common interest. It also provides the opportunity to restrict information to as much or as little as one wishes. However when I first joined it was a case of moving step by step, devoting sufficient time and attention to produce something which reflected me and my project, accepting the technical help available without being preoccupied by it. I wholehearted reject that strand of concept and installation art where the artist delegates the technical making of the work to others without understanding and being able to control the technology, as without the latter such individuals are creative thinkers and creative thinking can become an art form but I cannot accept that this also applies to those whose work is fundamentally visual or audio.

The unexpected discovery of myspace was friends and the comprehensive searchable database. There are 339000 listings under contemporary artists, 374000 under concept artists and 51600 under installation artists.

After the ubiquitous Tom, my first friend was a singer, musician and composer who finished third in the X factor Ben Mills who sounds like Rod Stewart and Joe Cocker, but is also an excellent musician and composer. I planned top attend his concert at the Newcastle City Hall

I was due to attend his concert in late summer at the Newcastle City Hall and then suddenly the tour was cancelled along with the proposed single. I thought the choice of single was wrong and of those featured on myspace 'Don't miss a thing' seemed to me better. The album the first of a signing for five reached third spot in the first week. I was then delighted to find that he was appearing at the headline group in one of the five afternoon free concerts over weekends in South Shields in July. Because there were a number of performers his session were restricted by time and before then the success of the afternoon among the family audience was the female group who sings the Sheila's Wheels Car Insurance commercial. The gig is a difficult one with a very mixed audience, many of whom come into the park stop for a while and then continue with walking the sea front, going for an ice cream or cup of tea, taking the younger children to the playgrounds and amusements, across into the adjacent park for a ride on the train, or on the lake or just getting close to the swans. The weather is also a factor. Many artists, especially those used to adoring and attentive audiences find the atmosphere difficult and having attended the shows over the past two years, it is clear that there are two kinds of performers. Those that come and give 100% whatever the day and the crowd and those who come and deliver what they have been paid for and no more, sometimes less. One felt Ben and his band were half hearted, comments about coming to Newcastle did to help, or having just woken up from having been asleep, and not sure where he was and then starting do one number when band decided they were doing something else disappointed the majority including me. I looked again at his myspace site and the band site and also on Wikipedia and there was no indication of new work, or any live appearance. Wikipedia mentioned that last summer he had appeared on a specialist TV medical programme in which he is reported to have admitted to having developed a serious cocaine habit over a four year period before the X Factor opportunity.

I break off to watch a repeat of six sixes hit by Durham's Paul Collingwood as England in the fourth on day game in New Zealand to achieve the quickest fifty by an Englishman in this type of game. It was a case of brilliant batting and brainless bowling to quote one commentator. It was also an innings in which for the first time five members of the team scored forty runs or more and with four reaching over 50. There were thirty hits for four and ten hits for six in the total of 340 for 6 on a perfect wicket on a perfect day on the pacific coast at Napier, rebuilt in the art deco style after an earthquake in the 1930's.

Originally I decided to build 101 friends whose profile reflected aspects of my life and then something happened which I did not anticipate, I received requests, the majority from singers, musicians and groups, but also a significant number of interesting individuals, a few of whom have maintained contact. Of the 339 listed Friends 180 accepted from searching, sometimes listed as the friends of friends. One interesting aspects is that some friends come and go with some sixty departing either because they have left myspace or left me, the latter is not surprising given what I have written from time to time is likely to have alienated vast chunks for committed interest groups as well as individuals. It would be a misrepresentation to say that I have always alienated friends as well as foes throughout my life, as there have bee three periods, the first between 1959 and 1963, then between 1964 and 1971, and then again between 1985 and 1991 when making genuine friends and as part of my political and work interests was successful, but as the end self aware existence draws closer I have become more concerned with consistency and the truth and my own interests than those of others. I almost daily wish that this was not so as much as expressing gratitude for the opportunities that also now have opened for me.

The most surprising aspect of the Myspace experience is that friends and passers read and continue to read the writing as for the previous 18 months before Myspace I had scribbled notes two or three times a day on an AOL blog site, with what now seems impossible 151 postings in June 2005 and with no indication that anyone had been read any of them, or looked at the daily postings of pictures, sometimes as many as 300 - some 900 writings and abut 50000 photos of the 200000 photos then taken. The lack of reaction did not matter because what I am doing I am doing for me. It is an esoteric activity.

That others are reading the writings and, looking at the pictures on a regular basis, sometimes commenting, is much appreciated, especially as it reminds of the need to try and to ensure that what I say does not intentionally affect others in an adverse way. Technically there have been some 328 posts in the year but only 286 are original as the others are correct. Until the 19th there have been 7259 viewings which works out an average of 25 a writing which is amazing.

Selecting a top list of friends has been a constant problem given that I have wanted to reflect the diverse nature of friends and interests, my work and my life, to remain loyal to those who were there at the beginning and to include those whole life and work I would like to draw attention to the casual visitor from time to time having recently celebrated over 3000 viewings of the profile.

The one area where I have not achieved intentions is the creation of volumes of 101.75 photos and this is my priority over the coming weeks, to finish as many of those that have been commenced as possible as well as those from Rivera 2007 which are not already included in the photos of South Shields and Sunderland. Both activities require time which is not the priority for the early part of the week. I had also hoped to add a total of 101 videos, although given the time some profiles take to load, I want to avoid a similar situation but the present selection is unbalanced because of too little jazz and classical music and from other genres.

One of my reasons for not giving priority to completing some tasks is the point that means are more important than ends although it is important to have a goal. How I spent my life every and any day is more important than what my life adds up to although I am interested in trying to find out if the good I have tried to do out weights the sins, whether intention or not.

Ill be home for Christmas and The Lost Child and second 101 Blog list for the previous years

It is 10am at the start of a new week and after going to bed very late of recent times I am still feeling sleepy, wondering what the day will bring, Going outside to place the rubbish bin the other side of garage door, it was cold enough not to be tempted by the clear blue sky and abandon what I am and need to do. What will this day otherwise bring? I switch on the TB early to find "Take That" singing I'd wait for Life, meaning waiting for someone to bring the singer writer into being, into life. I understand, that even if the sentiment is wrong, if you are unhappy with your experience then you should go in search for happiness, or should you? What are your commitments, duties, responsibilities to others? These may out weight whatever is the present state of feelings, the conditions of the environment. Does this mean never taking risks, gambling with your own future because it might adversely affect others? Songs and poems express our feelings but should never be taken as guides as to how we should live or the choices to be made. Only a thorough knowledge of all the issues and circumstances should govern decisions which affect the lives of others. I will review this statement in a while and see if I still have the same thoughts and opinions.

Channel Four has changed from wartime films to a sci fi at the start of the week. Michael Rennie will star again as the alien who comes to earth to help human kind only to be greeted with fear and aggression, until he meets a sympathetic woman. The Day the Earth Stood still failed to convince and disappointed those of us born too soon until the arrival of Star Trek and the subsequent contemporary electronic wizardry. Later Channel Four has a documentary on the original suicide bombers, The Kamikaze pilots of World War II. Later still there are several violent action movies on three terrestrial channels. Now I find I'll be home for Christmas, a contemporary made World War II family film probably made to help USA families when their sons and husbands are away from home in some war. The film does not feel anything like I remember and although there are moments when the loss of loved ones is remembered it is all sugar coasted and rose tinted suitable for a family audience. The title is that of a Bing Crosby song but some sixty or seventy other artists, many the most famous, have tried to cash in subsequently, and did,
Later there was the start of a film about a senior military man who authorised the use of Agent Orange in the Vietnam War having been assured it affected only vegetation and not human beings, Later his son develops incurable cancer and his grandson is also disabled. The film is based on a true situation. I decided to have a long hot bath hot bath and attend to my body. The experience is a good one and I clean the bath immediately afterwards and notice that the basin could also do with a cleanse. However I do not go as far as my aunt who shocked an occupational therapist who declared that she and my mother has to the most polished but dangerous bath in the land. I remember being bathed by my aunt in a tin bath in our living room, embarrassed because other members of the extended family were in and out of the room. It was only later that we had a bathroom with an individualistic water heater.

It was a bad day for the monarchy. It is the 56th day of

the Inquest into the death of Princess Diana and her lover at the time. His father poured out all his pent up frustration and beliefs about what happened and it will be interesting to see the extent of the reporting in the press tomorrow although there has been extensive reporting of his words. Because they are so over the top and far fetched all that will happen is that he will be discredited with far reaching significance. At 9pm there was a showing of a series about a fictitious young king, his younger brother, his neurotic sister, and a continuing and manipulating Queen Widow. This is an anti monarchist and anti palace staff dangerous piece of nonsense as it gets. The writing is abysmal but the actors do their best. Even more preposterous was the late night film Chain of Command in which a US President arranges a meeting with an ambitious political gangster in a situation where the bodyguards of the two lots of bodyguards do not keep their weapons allowing for one lot to nearly take over the other, and to first open the mobile launching box and for the President to launch one nuclear weapon on Beijing with the consequence that Washington is also obliterated in retaliation, but further disaster is averted by the action of one security officer who carries out the letter of his instructions to guard the mobile Doomsday unit, even if this means immobilising the President. The film is based on the assumption that one security officer would abdicate his position and open the unit because his wife and family were under immediate threat.

Recently the Australian prime Minister apologise for the policy FO removing aboriginal children from their parents and cultures against the wishes of their parents. This after there was a film about a similar approach in the USA when children of Indian Americans were also removed and sold to be brought up by white American families. The subject of this film, The Lost Child, is the discovery of the background by one of the children, after she has married and has children of her own, together with the impact of this on her family as she returns to the contemporary reservation and attempts to find her roots and origins. The interesting aspect of the film for me is that she and her family also have an impact on her extended family and community. The parallels between her situation and my own are significant as the native Gibraltarians, and Maltese are a unique people, the Maltese living on a south on an island the size of the Isle of Wight, between Italy, Greece and North Africa and Gibraltar almost an Island Rock gateway to the Mediterranean and Suez Canal, with its small population nestling around parts of its coastline. Interestingly I have been putting together the limited available documentation about myself. There is so little, my mother having destroyed her papers as her illness developed much to the distress of my aunt, and her premature and preventable death prevented the opportunity of my being able to talk to her about my roots and her own experience. I still feel the child no one wanted other than my aunt, kept secret and deprived of my natural homeland and their culture and heritage.

The second 100.75 MySpace Blogs List
101.75 My Space List
102 Three memories which may last 12.06.2007
103 Monsoon weather 13.06.2007
104 Falklands and the White Countess 14.06.2007
105 Cimbatta in the rain 15.06.2007
106 If I was God I would not have 16.06.2007
107 Performances 17.06.2007
108 The Draughtsman's Contract . 18.06.2007
109 1234 19.06.2007
110 A fine Romance 21.06.2007
111 Somewhere between fantasy and 22.06.2007
112 Glastonbury 23.06.2007
113 Nothing much notes 24.06.2007
114 Extremes and Passion Fantastique 25.06.2007
115 Changes in government 26.06.2007
116 Parting Notesday 27.06.2007
117 Anti social behavioural disorder 28.06.2007
118 Memory Lane Film Disaster 29.06.2007
119 Tate Modern Passionate Dance 01.07.2007
120 Diana the Concert 02.07.2007
121 Anything Goes 03.07.2007
122 The Freedom not to believe 04.07.2007
123 Fanny and Alexander part one 05.07.2007
124 Summer wine 21.07.2007
125 Self Congratulations 22.07.2007
126 Biblical Weather 23.07.2007
127 Film Notes 25.07.2007
128 Film Notes for a future generation 24.07.2007
129 A short walk around Trow Rocks 25.07.2007
130 An evening with Diana Melly 26.07.2007
131 We should talk 27.07.2007
132 An Intrusion upon private grief 28.07.2007
133 Grecian waters 29.07.2007
133 Big brother changes my Day 30.07.2007
134 Novel 2007 1 02.08.2007
135 A walk back in time 03.08.2007
136 Big Brother 184 2007 04.08.2007
137 Novel 2007 Chapter 1 continued 05.08.2007
138 Super Sunday 06.08.2007
139 Not a good Day 07.08.2007
140 Whitburn Colliery 08.08.2007
141 My Mother into hospital 11.08.2007
142 Davies, Freud Temple Park 12.08.2007
143 A rant possibly about institution 14.08.2007
144 Ingmar Bergman creative genius 15.08.2007
145 Déjà vu 18.08.2007
146 A Minor Miracle 19.08.2007
147 Martin Scorsese 20.08.2007
148 Seaburn promenade Lambton Worm 21.08.2007
149 Procrastination 22.08.2007
150 Roker Park 24.08.2007
151 Roker Beach 25.08.2007
152 Death in Variance forms 26.08.2007
153 The River Wearmouth 27.08.2007
154 St Peters Glass Centre University 28.08.2007
155 Sunderland Old Town 29.08.2007
156 Rivera 1 30.08.2007
157 Steel Galleon L Strada one man band 31.08.2007
158 Riverside morning 01.09.2007
159 Myths and Legends 02.09.2007
160 Films of varying quality and signif 03.09.2007
161 Cleadon Hills 04.09.2007
162 Wow Days Jarrow 06.09.2007
163 Wow Newcastle Theatreland 08.09.2007
164 Wow Saturday 09.09.2007
165 Rick Rescorla 10.09.2007
166 Pray to St Joseph 12.09.2007
167 Prayer for Mabel 14.09.2007
168 Apocalypto 16.09.2007
169 WOW QE2 17.09.2007
170 Sunday Newspapers 1 18.09.2007

Constantine il grande, East of Sudan and Spill

Where do I begin on the day which mark the my first year on MySpace? I will finish yesterday and then begin a week of celebrations.

Once before this year I got into a state about my personal health and then found myself drained and listless. Then it lasted several days when I only fancied a light soup and spat out the skins of grapes. I wrote yesterday morning "Hopefully after a daytime sleep and recovering appetite and energy tomorrow will be a normal day. " This morning I was late up after a very good night and now feel lazy and listless. It is 10.30 am. I have completed the washing up and played five games of chess and will now make a cup of tea, but the curtains are still drawn and I have not shaved or cleaned my tea. I might even have a shower or even a bath, but there is now so much to work out what is going on in my head, so much to do , so much to write that if I am not careful it will all mask what I feel. Who is kidding who?

I am drinking my cup of one bag made in a pot cup of tea and I have the oven on for the Sunday roast. Yesterday morning I walked in a cold but sunny morning to the post office, Boots and the Supermarket and found the effort tiring, buying some lamb chops for the evening meal and a stuffed pork roast for Sunday lunch. At the fish counter for prawns in shell where a carton cost 96 pence an assistant drew my attention to a special £1 a carton offer on King Prawns which I used with a simple salad and roll for lunch. I missed the buy two for £5 sticker on the Roast Pork, paying £2.96p for one. I should have bought the two and frozen the other. I have some ready made apple sauce in the fridge but there was no mint sauce for the chops, which I tried to first quick grill, but had to transfer to the oven grill as the cooking was too uneven in the quick grill. Last Christmas with a voucher I bought a 500 page colourful picture cook book called Low Fat but the ingredients were all for four and complex which made the cooking long and it would cupboards stocked with stuff I never used up before use expiry dates. This Christmas I was given a cooking for one book by the Norwich fan Delia Smith which is very well written in that it explains the ingredients one needs to have in the cupboard and the food looks delicious and I am tempted but will postpone until I have made progress in others things, like losing some weight instead of putting it on. I believe one reason has been eating too much dairy products the cheese omelettes but at last night I found out how to make then fluffy, well in theory. The roast is in the oven.

I watched one film in its entirety yesterday and later researched he subject and made lost of notes such was the interest "Constantinto ii grande with Cornel Wilde in the title role of this Italian production of a very fictionalised account of the rise to becoming Emperor during which time he stopped the persecution of Christians and changed the approach of the state towards their employment in government and public office. He is not regarded as a Saint by the Church of Rome, but Flauvius Valerius Aurelius Constantinus, is regarded as Constantine the Great and Saint Constantine among Eastern Orthodox and Byzantine Catholic Christians.

The 1962 film is interesting but factually dubious , covering up and misrepresenting many key matters in order to create entertainment and a sense of a climax, although one does need some knowledge of the period and the differences between Emperors, Augustus and Caesar and how they functioned. The film has Cornell Wilde in the role of Constantine although at times his role is secondary to that of Hadrian (not of the wall fame) and Hadrian's romantic attachment to a Christian girl played by a German Actress Christine Kaufman. Cornell Wilde was born in Hungry and had a good career and stared in many films of my childhood and later and is worth attention on another day, The wife iof Constantine, Fausta, is played in the film by Belinda Lee, who was killed in a car crash shortly after the film was completed.

I must admit that I was not and am not prepared to devote the time to full understand the complexity of actual relationships, differences and interactions which took place at the time in a period which marked the decline of the Roman Empire. I have an abridged version by D M Low of Gibbons Decline and Fall of the Roam Empire which nevertheless had some 900 pages and where Constantine I has one of the, if not the longest list of references in the index. His father became responsible for Britannia, and he joined him for a year based at York and advancing beyond Hadrian's Wall in the sorting out of the Picts, at one period, and where I now live close by its supply port and former seaport, although the Wall and the forts run on the Northern bank of the Tyne, Constantine I and his sons II and III also have good coverage in Peter Salway's Roman Britain in the Oxford History of England series as does his father Constantinius. Of which there were four. There are fewer references in The Grandeur that was Rome, J C Stbart/s book which is more about buildings and reference to the Constantine Arch and to Constantinople being renamed in his honour after his death, and continuing until the 15th century when the Ottoman Empire took over. There is also mention in the briefer pictorial Imperial Rome, in he Time Life Great Ages of men series which contains many interesting and accurate photographic recreations, including great aerial shot of the Wall. If I include my books on art, and the myths and legends of Greece and Roman, there is a month's study reading available so these are very much notes of notes.

My basic understanding is that this was also a period in Roman history where its supreme government was divided first between two Emperors, East and West with the seats of the government Rome and Milan, but then there was further subdivision with the creation of sub Emperors who had dictatorial control over sub divisions but were answerable to the Emperors. There was also the situation that while positions tended to become heredity, much like recent USA presidents with the potential for two lots of sixteen years rule by the Bushes and the Clintons, at that time in Rome, you could become self appointed, especially if you were good at oratory and or controlled and were successful with the armies, but you would not last long if you did not command their respect and loyalty as well as of the people you ruled over. Much like football managers and their chairmen, me thinks. (me thinks too much). The roast potatoes are also in the oven but I forgot to immediately reset the timer.

Given the lack of contemporary records and accounts of the life of Constantine and his family we can only make an approximation that he was born while his father, an officer in the Roman army on his travels around 272 and that his mother was a simple uneducated woman, that she was probably not married, but she was or became a secret Christian early on, and may have influence her son in this respect. His father Constantinius first rose to a position of influence when he became part of the imperial bodyguard to Emperor Aurelian but then he had a stroke of great luck because new Emperor Diocletian, who came from the same land as his father appointed him father governor of Dalmatia. About four years later his father was appointed praetorian prefect in Gaul and he took a second wife, the stepdaughter of the new ruler of the Western part of the empire which was based at Milan. This was a move by the senior emperor Diocletian who decided to restrict himself to the East. The senior ruler than deciding to create junior rulers making Constantine's father one of the two new a Caesars, sub rulers, so he had dramatically become a member of one of the four ruling families of the Empire. The area of power was Britannia (but which excluded most of Northumberland and Scotland), France and Spain and Germany.

However at this point Constantine was sent, some suggestion, taken hostage, to the court of the Emperor Diocletian where he was given an education and a military training. There was then one of those developments which required lots more reading and understanding so I may have it wrong but when Diocletian became ill and his opposite number resigned, Constantine's father became Emperor of the West, and two new Caesars were appointed, but not Constantine or the son the other Emperors as might have been expected an which created resentment and rivalry.
As the film portrays there is evidence that efforts were made to discredit Constantine, but he did well when he helped out his father in Gaul and Britannia, based at York for time and during a period of illness before his death, his father engineered Constantine as his successor. It was during this period that the two sides of Constantine became evident. On one had he continue the approach of his father of tolerance towards Christians but he remained ruthless towards foes, feeding two captured kings and their warriors to beasts in the amphitheatre. There is also the suggestion that his approach to the Christians was more strategic, tactical and diplomatic than from faith and devotion. There was then a period of much in fighting, and machinations in which Constantine was demoted at one point until civil wars between those trying to hold and gain position broke out around 312.

The strength of Constantine's position si that he controlled the great strength and experience of the Roman armies, but then something happened which has become legend and myth. And was rather like those six children in Bosnia some twenty five years ago who believed they were seeing the Madonna and were being given messages, as it is recorded that he and his men saw a heavenly cross in the sky with the message that this should become their symbol. There have been a number of interpretation about this development but it appears to have brought confidence and authority and after one battle in 317 his two sons were made Caesars, with areas of land control and responsibility, the son who became Constantine II.

The film is about the role of Constantine in changing the position of Christians, and it is factual that he did issue an edict from Milan about religious tolerance in 313. How far Constantine I truly accepted and adopted the Christian faith of the day remains unknown, except that it was not until his forties that there is record that he declared himself a Christian. He and his mother became great patrons of the Christianity building basilicas, granting exemptions from certain taxes and promoting Christians to high ranking offices. He is reported having responsibility for the creation for the first Basilica of St Peter's and for the Church of the Holy Sepulchre.
It also accepted that while he promoted religious tolerance and promoted Christianity in general he left doctrinal matters and forms of worship to the church hierarchy. He is credited with arranging the first Ecumenical Council, the Council of Nicaea in 325. It is recorded that he refused to allow Jews to own or circumcise their slaves. However there were limits to his position as he outlawed Christians being able to convert to Judaism and what happened in 326 probably accounts for why the Catholic Church of Rome never elevated Constantine to the role of Saint, because it has been established that he was responsible known to have arranged the deaths of one of his son and his wife. This is believed to not have been politically based but because of immorality. He was succeeded by two of his sons and one of his daughters became the wife of the Emperor Julian, an avenue being named after this Emperor near where I now live.

On one hand it is known that that some leading families who refused to become Christians were denied positions of power, but is also known that approximately two thirds of his top government were non Christians. Not too much can be made fo the fact that he was only baptised shortly before his death because this was the custom and perhaps an insight into his character is that he had planned to be baptised in the river Jordan because this is where Christ is said to have been baptised by John, but when he felt death approaching he hurriedly arranged for the ceremony to take place where he was.
He secular work is also insightful of the times and the man. He is known for making the occupations of baker and butcher heredity but the decision to abolish the role of tenant farmer, turning them into serfs became a keystone for life the life many throughout the Middle Ages which appears contrary to his professed Christian faith. While he was concerned for example about the position of young girls and their abduction and seduction, the punishment for a chaperone who allowed their charge to be seduced was to have molten lead poured down their throats. He enacted Sunday as a day of rest and allowed Easter to be celebrated in public. He made it a crime to collect higher taxes than those authorised but the punishment for being caught continuing to do so was death. Gladiatorial games were official abolishes in 325, but they continued because of the lack of policing and penalties. A very interesting man and times

Almost immediately afterwards I started to watch East of Sudan also made in the 1960.s with Antony Quinn and Sylvia Sims in the main roles but where my interest was with the two others in this motley group of four escaping slave traders and wild animals, expediting witch doctors and multilingual and educated Arab tribesmen warriors while General Gordon clung on to Khartoum. The first was a young officers played by an almost unrecognisable Derek Fowlds who first came to international public attention as the political secretary to a Cabinet Minister in the Yes Minister, subsequently Yes Prime Minister series, and who then became the police Inspector in the Sunday night still popular series of Heartbeat, which commenced in 1991 and is set in the Yorkshire Dales en route to Whitby, a countryside I have come to know and visit occasionally over the past four decades. Derek then became the owner of the village pub with a continuing interest in police and community matters when he retired, being two years older than me in real life, so our contemporary life experience has been similar.

Playing a child about ten years of age was another barely recognisable face, given that the role was of an indigenous offspring being brought to safety by the Sylvia Sims character. This was Jenny Agattur who fist came to the attention of British audiences as a major actress in the BBC serial the Railway Children, and she hen appeared in the film 1970 film. Some thirty years later she stared in the remake, this time as the mother. Born in the west country of England but spending her childhood abroad as her father was an army officer, she lived in Dhekelia, Cyprus and Kwala Lupur and East of Sudan was her first film having been picked out from a casting search while attending a ballet class.

She became known to international audiences with the film set in the Australian outback and which involves her relationship as a school girl, with her younger brother and an aboriginal adolescent after their father commits suicide. Afterwards she admitted to being shocked by the explicit naked scenes in the film, which were only allowed to be shown as she had become sixteen as the filming got underway. She later had adult roles in a number of films but in 18918 she met, lived with, became pregnant and married a Swedish hotelier and subsequently devoted the greater part of her life to her Christmas Day born son, to her husband, and to occasional TV and film work. For a time she had a second home at the Lizard in Cornwall but is reported to now live in Camberwell, London. I fell asleep and did not see the end of the film

The rest of the day was a mixture of buts of mostly silly films and the last sixteen of the FA Cup, but not much work. At one point I switched channels to find a version of the Wizard of Oz in which Toto has become in real life a prawn in a fish tank and subsequently a puppet, When I say that the wicked witch is Miss Piggy this is the Muppets version and some fo the jokes made me laugh out loud which is rare. I wonder what children made of it all. Thinking of the original Wizard of Oz which I used to watch with my mother on a DVD which includes a great background documentary, and of Judy Garland, and the recent amazing interview with her daughter in the Actor's studio, I switched over to the final moments of the Freddie Mercury memorial concert to find Liza Minnelli closing the show with We are the Champions. I have watched parts of this show from time to time recently, preferring to watch my two volume tape and a made up tape of he original.
In the evening I gave whole hearted attention to the final of the tribute competition with a three month contract in Las Vegas the prize. For once the British public got it perfectly right with a white Lionel Ritchie who at times got the voice and mannerisms perfect. The great surprise of the contest was the growth in performance of a 52 year old former van delivery driver who voice sounds almost the same as Frank Sinatra and part of me wanted him to win as the oldest swinger in town, rightfully he took second place to the amazing perfect reincarnation of Dust Springfield. Two of her performances last night were world class in their own right and brought tears to the eyes of the man who was a personal friend of the original singer, Her success has only just started, I did watch Dusty, a tribute musical at the Theatre Royal Newcastle which was impressive and enjoyable, but this was in a different dimension. I must find out the real name.

I also watched part of the end of the first part of the Curse of Tutankhamun and where oddly the second part did not immediately follow My interest is only to see if is as predictable as the first part. In the background was Spill and meant to be taken seriously cautionary tale about a Presidential assistant who secretly arranges biological and germ warfare work which goes horribly wring leading to killings, body burnings and cover up which nearly leads to the President, other leaders and top staff becoming victims had it been for the James Bond work of a former sports hero and Presidential bodyguard with the help of a vet, would also have been infected. Unusually and unconvincingly the hero decides not to accept the inevitable cover up and compromise as being in the international interest of the new world order, and goes public denouncing and testifying and bringing the house down. An awful film. An odd double helping on Saturday nights is an Australian secret service drama, a poor version of Spooks which I never managed to see one programme through because of conflicting and overlapping other programmes.

The football events of this year was the defeat of Liverpool at home by Barnsley, the Yorkshire club who ground I have visited several times as it is possible to visit and return in a day with he ground being a short drive from the motorway, also applying to Leeds, closest and the two Sheffield's, further away, The ground was on a hill with the wind driving in from the open corners and a nervous and unfriendly local police force who in my judgement created a dangerous situation on one visit in terms of the potential of crowd crushing. Liverpool had plenty of opportunity to take control fo the game after going 1 up and in fact appeared to be in control for large chunks of the game and should have scored several times had it not been for some brilliant positioning and instinctive saves from the newly appointed goal keeper, and some luck. Barnsley equalised and then had a brilliant goal in the dying seconds to send the supporters into raptures. The loyal you will never stand alone Scouse crowd who give quality and effort their due, turned on the American club owners, but I suspect this was as much directed at the manager who been given the money, made some good purchases last summer but who has failed to produce a team worthy of a top four position. If he loses in the Championship league this week his days as manager will be short.